On the Psychology of Eroticism

Imagine if one of the most important things in your partner’s mind was to make you feel pleasure. How nice would that be?

Welcome to your Erotic Journey.

Imagine how great it would be if one of the most important things in your partner’s life was to want to play with you and make you feel good … couldn’t get enough of it … eager to explore new ways to please you and so she could experience your satisfaction and joy.

Just imagine!

Whether you have a partner or are solo for the moment once you’ve learned the secrets I am about to reveal your life is going to change dramatically. The best thing is that once it does you will be ready for it and your pleasure and abundance will increase and multiply many times over. This is because a person’s sexuality is one of the essential parts of being a whole person and one of the most rewarding aspects of a person’s life. When one possesses the right key to unlock the treasures behind this door one’s erotic life will be sheer ecstasy.

How do we think about the erotic?

The way people think about the word “erotic” and “sex” is different for each person depending upon our gender, upbringing, religion, ethnicity, community, experiences, and so on. Who can say for another person exactly what these words might mean. For some, the words, out of shame associated with them, are rarely spoken. For others, they are part of their daily communication and may have something to do with their profession as counselors, physicians or therapists.

The Coach

The Coach is a story about a man and a woman who encounter one another for learning and achieving certain goals that will result in a happier and more prosperous love life. In this story the coach is male and the student is female and much younger. From the beginning of their journey together a great trust develops and eventually they accomplish all they wish to achieve.

If ever the saying, “The best things in life are free”, were true … it certainly applied to the erotic journey for both the coach and the student. It was a gift. There was no money involved. The wise and happy coach simply wishes to pass on to others in a meaningful way the valuable lessons he has learn in life in order to enjoy seeing the benefits helping their lives.

Love and kindness throughout was exchanged. It seemed that in the end there might have even been a number of unexplainable miracles that happened. One cannot purchase true freedom. It must be bestowed by someone greater in certain ways and indeed himself free. What can a slave teach but more slavery. A greedily consuming glutton has no gift to give. A person obsessed and addicted to romance, self indulgence or perverse domination will be lacking and despairing in the end. But the person who understands and practices selfless giving, especially in this area, will grow in wisdom and in emotional and spiritual strength.

Some may wonder how an erotic journey accomplishs these things. You be the judge. If after you have begun to experience the benefits gained by studying this material you will find that giving to others, and your results, will prove to be the best teacher. May you be blessed in your learning. If you should say the erotic journey is a carnal and shameful thing and only through prayer, self denial and meditation can a person learn how to be truly happy, then I say pray, fast and meditate well that you might succeed in your quest for happiness. Perhaps one day we will meet and exchange ideas and be the better for it.

Those who feel you have already achieved great happiness have only to gain perhaps greater insight if even one good idea emerges to enlighten and inspire you. Nothing here can threaten you in the power of what you have certainly accomplished.

If you have achieved a high degree of happiness on your own erotic journey as a professional, by that I mean -a sex worker, then I ask you to consider revisiting your life’s work as an amateur instead of as a professional. This is because things done our of love alone are different than what is done for pay or hire even for those who love their work.


The experiences written about here shared between the coach and the student represent a movement toward greater belonging, esteem and self actualization. If Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is correct, these are higher than the need for survival, comfort and social acceptance. The experiences expressed in this work represent a movement toward greater belonging, esteem and self actualization. These higher needs are difficult to attain when the lower needs are unfulfilled. Through the erotic journey the lower needs as well as the higher needs are more easily satisfied. Those struggling for basic survival will find themselves more easily and be nurtured. Personal power, self actualization and dynamic self expression come by “giving” pleasure to one’s partner through the erotic journey.

Relationships Get A Little Worn

As the life goes on many who were so fond of one another sometimes begin feel they may have reached the limits of love and pleasure with a partner. I myself reached such a limit and my first marriage terminated on account of it. The deep innate impulse to please the other so sincerely, in time, began to wane and soon pleasing the other became a chore and quite a difficult task. Discouragement eventually set in and nearly every aspect of the relationship began to sour. There was no longer any giving. Taking became the chief motivator as feelings of being protective and distant seemed the best solution to a closed and disconnected relationship.

Without elaborating on the details I’m sure we are all aware of, may I encourage you to consider that what is revealed in this story is how trust and openness in a relationship is fostered by creating a safe environment for friendship. With openness comes connection which reinforces that trust compelling each to move toward a certain vulnerability so much guarded in failing relationships. Once a deep sense of vulnerability in their trust has been achieved intimacy begins to manifest as each partner accepts and cherishes the other fully and offers their service and support to bring the other to their highest level of pleasure and satisfaction.

From the beginning of this coach/student friendship -criticism, blame and disappointment have never existed. Patience, refinement and practice have been the key elements which have made their erotic journey a meaningful and delightful experience at every turn. Where difficult moments have arisen these were viewed as important milestones it their journey rather than insurmountable obstructions, the greatest satisfaction and pleasure being achieved in overcoming each one.

So, I am announcing here that more on “The Coach” will be following shortly. And, please do not feel shy to offer any insights, questions or comments you may have.



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